sometimes i feel as though the story of our little family has had too many climactic points. just when we're settling ourselves into a prolonged denouement up goes the action and it's buckle your seatbelts for another wild ride.
the last climax was scott losing his job in north vancouver. suddenly and painfully and honestly, without the needed character development that would have prepared me for it. right before the climax hit scott and i were over at Barnabas camp - he was leading worship there and had fandangled me a night away with him. we asked for prayer and i had this image of being high up on a sailboat, in the crows nest i believe it's called. we were in a raging fearful storm - i was being whipped around while up on this pole, and i looked down at the deck to see a man i knew to be Jesus holding the wheel. "i've got this" he said.
i had to remind myself of that image countless times in the coming season: while watching my husband walk from shattering self-doubt and disappointment to a place of confidence again in his calling; while witnessing the grief of my children who lost not only their familiar church but eventually their house and neighbourhood; selling our home in faith that we would know where our next would be before the closing date; and through my own anger and fears for the future: "i've got this".
and, He did.
and, i believe, He does.
so, the next chapter for janet anderson is set in beautiful victoria, bc. hallelujah! i remember thinking "where could we go in canada that's more beautiful than north vancouver?" and tah dah! enter victoria: small city of history and beauty, with charming buildings and festivals and waterfront, small shops for miles and beaches and spring beginning in january. i get a peek at the ocean from my kitchen window, have deer munching on my bushes in my front yard, my kids go to schools with great teachers who seem to have been tailor-made for each of them (He's got this!) and we are mere blocks from our new church: lambrick park.
it is a good chapter, and i hope that i can begin to write again.
a couple days ago i read psalm 142 and these lines seemed to sum up the past couple of years quite well for me:
when i am overwhelmed
you alone know the way i should turn...
i pray to You oh LORD.
i say, "You are my place of refuge.
You are all i really want in life"
i'm hoping for years of denouement - i mean, small points of excitement and intrigue and surprise, but nothing as climactic as the last 6 years have been. it is good to have space to look back and see the lines of faithfulness drawn across your life, to notice the recurring plot rhythms - whether positive or negative, and the ways in which the action has changed you. i'm looking forward to sharing what i see and learn with you.
and if your story is a storm today:
He's got this.